cant wait. i can not wait. even though i know when i get back, there will be the same monotony that i left there six months ago. but still. im somewhat comfortable there.
there is so much that i am going to force myself to experience. because doing nothing all the time really gets old. like surfing for instance. you would think i would have already done that. nope. havent.
life while waiting sucks a mean one though. its like time slows when you are waiting for something. and while time is slowing down your schedule seems to free up miraculously. so you have nothing to do except sit and wait for time.
its frustrating.
like when you want to watch TV and dont know where the remote it so you have to walk back and forth from the TV to change channels. not that i personally have put the effort to walk back and forth from the TV just to change channels. but that would be frustrating.
but, i dont really know what do to with myself. i have no ambition to do anything right now. and am struggling to word together sentences.
maybe i just need to get in trouble.
thats always a good thing. i mean, yeah, maybe the consequences that come from getting in trouble are negative. like degradation of reputation, loss of pay or wage or maybe just general disappointing your peers. that one can definitely be a killer. but when you get in trouble there is definitely no waiting going on. probably the best part is right before you get in trouble when you know your getting in trouble but no one else knows and your all anxious and stuff.
that feeling is the EXACT opposite of what i am feeling right now.
i feel like a slug.
I know the exact feeling. Atleast change is going to happen. Change, at the very least, passes the time.
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