so ... its been more than the regular time since i have posted a regular blog. i think it is due. maybe past due.
to start off i have a secret to share with the world. a secret that will probably make you rethink the way you think of me. a secret i couldnt tell you in person.
but online communication is so much easier to release.
so. the secret. the pending doom of my reputation. the thing that will change how people view me.
here it is:
recently, i have been doing something before i fall asleep. not masturbation. because that is too relative.
i have been watching twilight: the new moon. everynight. in fact i just finished watching it for the umpteenth time. i feel gay. i feel like a homosexual. i feel like a prepubescent girl screaming at the top of her lungs for edward. i feel like less than a man
but i cant help myself.
it is infecting. i just zone out. nothing else matters besides this love triangle that the film so terribly endorses me.
i feel like i need an intervention. but then again i enjoy watching it.
before you judge me. before you call me GAY. just realize i know how ridiculous it is. ha. and i know how faggoty it is.
but anyhow. my life is bland. working with reservist it the equivalent to going back to MCT. they dont know what it really means to be a garrison Marine. ... they may know what it is to deploy. but nothing what so ever about being a P O G. fuuuck
i wish i would have never said i wanted to go on this. this fucking shit storm. thats all it is. it isnt a float. it isnt MEU. it is a shit STORM. no one knows what to do and the people who do just pretend to not know.
i love it. and i hate it.
chaos means your living. but extended chaos means you dont know how to stop.
thats this fucking exercise.
im done with this shit.
i just going to write stories about what i want. ... like what its like to be a reservist. to know that in august they get to go back home to the civilian world and not give a damn. fuck them.
fuck this.
i recommend no active duty marine to work with reserve marines. haha i purposely miss grammared (AP STYLE MUTHA FUCKA) reservist. LOOK IT UP BITCH.
but anyways. i am about 7 days from actually getting on ship.
Cant wait. ... NOT
im not even in a unit. it is just a bunch of marines who came together to play marine on the weekend and found out that libo wasnt guaranteed. haha. i made myself laugh.
but i miss home. home being KBAY. ... sadly. but i miss it. most of all the people. the friends. the relationships. i dont even want to try to build relationships here. fuck everybody. im better of being alone anyways. plus i am the only public affairs marine here so no one knows what i am actually supposed to be doing. ... its funny but i end up doing it anyways. and you know what i am talking about. the whole extracurricular fucking thinking.
but, but, but, ... i wish i had a time machine. relive the recent past. not go one with the future. no matter how you look at it the future sucks compared to the past.
haha back to the future. Love that movie.
but anyways. the cat it out of the bag. every knows i am a twilight fan now. and quit frankly i dont give a damn. because i have a humungious crush on kristen stewart. its epic. ive never wanted a girl so badly. DAMN. maybe i just need to realize that i am on camp schwab. in okinawa. in japan. and i hate asians. maybe that has something to do with.
but comment bitches. i need you feedback more than air. you are my only resource of actual human interaction.
just do it.
like nike.
that is all.
platoon sgt.s carry out the plan of the day.
FUCK THAT SHIT.
